When my son was diagnosed with autism and developmental delays in the 1980s, I did what any parent does—I imagined his future. But in one meeting, a professional told me bluntly: “Your child’s not going to be a brain surgeon.”
I remember thinking: I don’t need him to be a brain surgeon. I just want him to have a good life.
That simple wish has required 40 years of relentless advocacy. But even back then, I knew I shouldn’t have had to fight this hard.
In the 1990s, when I advocated for my son to be integrated into a regular classroom alongside special programming, I was almost always the lone voice at the table. Professionals told me all the reasons why it couldn’t be done.
But we got there. Through high school, he was fully integrated. Things were adapted to meet his needs. He had friends he could eat lunch with, assistants who supported him, and a life that included him in his community.
It took exhausting advocacy. It took being his everyday champion—and having other champions in his life: grandparents, aunts, uncles, a network of people who believed he deserved more than survival.
After 40 years, I can tell you this with certainty: you don’t raise a child with a disability without a network of support. People have told me that I was brave or courageous, but I was simply doing what I had to do for my child to live a meaningful and fulfilling life.
Watching my son take the bus alone for the first time terrified me. But he wanted that independence—and part of being in a community means trusting him to navigate it. I’ve had to learn that it’s not my life; it’s his. My role is to help facilitate what he wants, not always what I think he needs.
Today, my son makes friends wherever he goes. He enjoys his work and chores. He likes working out, going to the mall, having his special lunch every week—just like anyone else. He’s a nice, loving person living the life he wants.
And that’s all I had ever hoped for— that he lives his best life.
But that doesn’t mean he doesn’t still need champions. We’re planning ahead for when we’re no longer here, ensuring his sibling is involved, making sure he has advocates beyond family. Because the reality is, we all need someone in our corner when life gets hard. We all need someone to champion for us when we’re too exhausted to advocate for ourselves.
People need people to thrive. It’s not just a disability issue— it’s a human one.
We have indeed come a long way since the 80s, but we haven’t come far enough. Parents today are still advocating as hard, or even more than we did decades ago. They’re still navigating fragmented services alone, still fighting for inclusion as if it’s optional, still hearing “no” when they ask for their children to be treated with dignity.
It’s exhausting. It’s frustrating. But it doesn’t have to be this way.
Not every person with a disability has a parent who can advocate. Not every parent has the network of support we had. And even those who do shouldn’t have to fight alone.
This Giving Tuesday, I’m asking you to become an Everyday Champion for people with disabilities.
Your support means a parent doesn’t have to be the lone voice at the table. It means a young adult has someone advocating for housing, employment, and independence as their parents age. It means people with disabilities have champions beyond their families—professionals, allies, and community members who believe they deserve more than survival.
When you support ABLE2, you’re strengthening the advocacy, programs, and networks that ensure no one fights alone. You’re creating the inclusive community we should have built decades ago.
My son grew up to be a nice, loving person who enjoys his life. That’s what makes me proud—not what he accomplished by society’s standards, but that he’s living the life he wants.
Every person with a disability deserves that. They deserve champions who will advocate when they’re exhausted, fight when systems fail them, and believe in their potential even when others don’t.
This Giving Tuesday, will you be an Everyday Champion for people with disabilities?
Champion lives of meaning and joy today: https://www.able2.org/be-an-everyday-champion/
Published by
Experienced Non-Profit Executive Director